Introduction
|
xi
|
Chapter 1: What It Means to Be a
Conservative
|
1 |
|
What Breed of Conservative Are You? (Take
the quiz) |
3 |
| The Conservative Manifesto |
12 |
| Rate Your Partisan Intensity Quotient
(PIQ) |
15 |
| What’s Your State of Embattlement? |
21 |
Chapter 2: Know Your Enemy
|
25
|
| The Liberal Manifesto |
26 |
| Frequently Asked Questions about
Liberals |
30 |
| A Field Guide to the Liberal Genus |
36 |
| Other Liberal Species You May Encounter |
42 |
| How to Rate a Liberal’s Partisan Intensity
Quotient (PIQ) |
44 |
| A Glimpse into the Liberal Utopia |
48 |
Chapter 3: Can’t We All Just Get
Along?
|
51
|
|
A Day in the Life of Conservatives vs.
Liberals |
52 |
| Battle of the Bumper Stickers |
58 |
| What Conservatives Say vs. What Liberals
Hear |
61 |
| What Liberals Say vs. What Conservatives
Hear |
64 |
| Common Enemies We Can All Agree to
Hate |
66 |
Chapter 4: Basic Training
|
73
|
| The Seven Habits of Highly Ineffective
Partisans |
74 |
| Do You Suffer From Argumentile Dysfunction? |
78 |
| How Not to Be an Asshole |
81 |
|
The
Ten Commandments of Partisan Warfare |
86 |
| How to Avoid Unhinged Lunatics |
94 |
| How to Detect Bullshit |
91 |
| How to Trip Up A Bullshitter |
101 |
| How to Spot Logical Fallacies |
103 |
| How to Win When You Can't Win Them Over |
107 |
Chapter 5: How to Win Friends While
Antagonizing People |
111
|
| How to Survive Family Sparring
Matches |
112 |
| What to Do If You’re Sleeping With the
Enemy |
115 |
| How to Manage Workplace Squabbles |
119 |
| How to Clash with Perfect Strangers |
122 |
| How to Argue Politics on Facebook and Twitter |
125 |
| How to Properly Engage in Internet Flame
Wars |
129 |
Chapter 6: Kick-Ass Comebacks to Liberal Nonsense
|
135
|
| How to Argue With Mindless Obama Lovers |
136 |
| How to Argue with Economic Ignoramuses |
140 |
| How to Clash with Clueless Liberals on Hot-Button Issues |
145 |
| How to Rebut Other Liberal Drivel |
151 |
Chapter 7: The Liberal Hall of Shame
|
157
|
| The Wing of Sex Fiends, Perverts, and Adulterers |
158 |
| The Wing of Douche Bags and Morons |
165 |
Chapter 8: How to Use Liberals’ Own Words against Them
|
173 |
| Stunningly Moronic Liberal Quotes |
174 |
| Ridiculous, Outrageous, and Delusional Liberal Quotes |
185 |
| Crazy Quotes by Celebrity Nut Jobs and Media Blowhards |
191 |
After-Words
|
199 |
|
When All Else Fails: 125,000 Ways to Insult
Liberals |
199 |
Acknowledgments
|
203
|
About the Author
|
207
|
